Avoidance

I am using a technique my Person sometimes uses when she is doesn't want to deal with things. I am staying in bed. She calls it napping, and sometimes she holds a closed book in one hand and she calls it reading. But it all amounts to the same thing. Avoidance.

What am I avoiding? I am avoiding Miss Furry who is holding court in the living room, sleeping on my couch and every now and again bestirring herself to go outside to chase my squirrels.

There is a saying about house guests and fish...but I LIKE the smell of old fish and I know Tasha does as well. Dogs generally handle strange smells two ways: they whiz on the stinky thing or they rub it all over themselves. I prefer the former, and when it comes to rotten fish, Tasha prefers the latter. So I guess if the saying is true, I actually like having Tasha here, though I sure haven't whizzed on her. (She'd probably retaliate somehow, like rubbing herself all over me.) So, let's say we have a detente going on, and we've established some boundaries: Tasha rules where ever she is and I hide in the bedroom!

Brotherly love

Notice that this is not a picture of a certain red dog and a certain Tasha the Furry Interloper. This is poor Adric using poorer Pico as a pillow, and they are roasting themselves on top of the radiator. Adric looks pretty silly and his cast says "OUCH" (his vet is something of a wag) but my Person will not let me laugh at him. To his face anyway. What I do in private is my own business.

Speaking of which, I don't have much private business these days. Every where I look, there is Tasha. Every time I scrounge for crumbs, there is Tasha. Every time I go outside, there is Tasha. The only time I don't see Tasha is when I close my eyes and when I do that she stares at me!

Move over Adric and Pico - I think I'd like to join the cat pile for awhile!

Double trouble

This may look like I am trying to take a chunk out of someone but it is just me whispering sweet nothings into my best frenemy's ear. Winter Storm Tasha has hit and here she is now, stirring things up in MY backyard.

I think things are going pretty well so far, except my Person takes Tasha for private walks and Tasha gets special treats and Tasha follows my Person everywhere (I didn't know dogs were supposed to do that) and Tasha scares all the squirrels away from the yard (that is MY job) and she scares the birds away too (another thing I didn't know dogs were supposed to do) and she licks my Person's hands (maybe my Person isn't very careful about washing up after she eats, or that's a third thing I didn't know dogs were supposed to do) and she generally is trying to insinuate herself into the structure of our little family by being nice to my cat brothers (okay, that's a fourth thing I didn't know dogs were supposed to do).

I don't know whether I am being shown up or not but I think I'd better come up with some plans to outdo Tasha!

All quiet

Winter has settled in. The snow is deep and crunchy and there is a new layer of fresh snow on top - snow covered snow as it were. The birds and squirrels are furiously hungry, almost as hungry as I always am.

I caught a squirrel today, briefly. My Person screamed and jumped up and down (she exhibits classic primate behavior) until I dropped the squirrel and it ran away. I think it was an unfair match - the snow makes it harder for little animals to scarper. But I am all in favor of unfair matches, as long as things are in my favor.

I'm inside now and all is quiet. The calm between the storms, one might say. The snow storm is over and the next storm is yet to begin: Tasha, the Barking Hairdo of a Sheltie is coming to stay with me. For weeks!!

Talk about unfair matches. I am no match for this Little Miss and I think she knows it. Until she gets here I am going to enjoy the quiet life and prepare myself for Winter Storm Tasha!

A new year?

I don't really understand the human desire for the Big Do-Over. Periodically they think they deserve a new beginning. It seems to me that everything is a continuation. One can't really change what has happened before - we can merely go forward, and maybe even with good intentions.

If he knew about the concept, Adric probably would like a do-over for the moment he slipped his ankle into that drawer pull and then jumped. But Adric doesn't know about such ideas, and neither does his broken ankle and neither do little red dogs. Full steam ahead is what I say. (Or what I think even if I don't say so.)

Life is full of surprises (a concept Adric DOES understand) and I was surprised by some pretty deep snow and some pretty big snow people down along the river. They gaze out over the ice sheet with attention and quiet humor. They are only here for season at the longest and don't have time to regret. They merely ARE, right now, right here. And I like that about them. And I like that about me, too.

The calendar may say it is a new year, but since I can't read, I am protected from such frivolity. So don't count on do-overs and maybe-laters and what-ifs. Go look at the river and run and smile at your Best Friend. Forward, I say!

A Christmas gift

My cat brother Adric and I have a prickly relationship - I relate and Adric prickles. And he is loaded with pricklers - in his mouth, on all four fur feet....it is like living with a little saber-toothed tiger. Well, "little" would be the wrong adjective. Adric is pretty big.

But the other day I thought we had reached a new level of friendship. I thought that Adric had prepared the best ever Holiday gift for me. After all, I've been pretty good lately. As good as dogs get that is. I thought he made me a cat punching bag! Out of himself!

It started like this. Adric was in the kitchen, jumping up on the counter and scouting food as usual. This accounts for the not-so-little aspect of Adric. My Person was busy being busy, or as I think of it, wasting time that could be spent playing with me. Suddenly a hideous commotion broke out in the kitchen: cat screams and hisses and growls. I ran right on in as any dog would. There, suspended by his skinny ankle from a drawer pull, hung big ol' Adric. I was beside myself with joy and started punching away at him. It seems he liked this even less than being suspended. The level of noise increased though that didn't seem possible.

My Person ran through the house, wailing (her usual response to surprises), ran to the kitchen, ceased wailing and commenced screaming, joining right in there with Adric. (My Person has been in a choir lately and I believe she was doing an alto accompaniment to Adric's mixed soprano and bass.) She lifted him up and out of the drawer pull and Adric rolled and stumbled down the basement stairs, hissing and spitting, and then my Person rounded on me like it was my fault for taking advantage of the moment and what I thought was an amusement arranged especially for me. "Back!" she hissed like a snake in full fury, and then she sailed down the basement stairs after Adric.

Well, a long time and a lot of mushy kissy noises and poor kitties and sweet adrics later, up the basement stairs came my Person holding one wounded Adric. And off to the Emergency Vet they went. I realized then that Adric hadn't made me a nice punching bag but had gotten himself in a dangerous fix. I too have been to the Emergency Vet recently and the thought of it still makes me shudder.

Well, the long and short of it is Adric broke his ankle bone and is taking some mighty powerful painkillers and is spending his time in MY little nap bed in the bathroom, all toasty and warm and with dilated eyes and purring and singing little cat songs to himself.

And I am down one Christmas present and a little bit in the dog house but I am getting pretty used to that.

So remember, always look a gift horse in the mouth because maybe it isn't really a gift and maybe you are headed for some trouble if you think it is!

Triple-walled dog house

That's where I live. Lately.

I admit. I've been bad. But it isn't really my fault.

First, my Person foolishly left the grocery bag up on the table where I am not suppose to go and I sort of got inside and pulled a quart container pack of organic chicken broth out from under a giant heavy winter squash and carried it into the living room and ripped it open and slurped up most of it except for a little puddle by the bookcase I forgot about until it was too late.

Second, my Person foolishly left a sealed box of bird seed by the back door that I happened to pull open and dump upside down and sample a good deal of before she surprised me by coming in that very back door without knocking first.

Third, I ate a pan of almond bars that my Person made for her Friend and left to cool on top of the stove. She didn't even yell at me or call me a bad dog after that one. She just gave me a steely look and said "You know what kind of dog you are," and I cowered and shrank and glued my ears to the back of my head and gave a gulp and unfortunately I also burped. She ignore me then and strode out of the room to lie down on the couch and read. And that was very bad because I had hidden some of the almond bars under the couch throw. And then she went to bed to read and that was very bad too because I had hidden some more almond bars under the blankets. "What are you?" she roared. "A grizzly bear making food caches?" Then she laughed but it was a grim sort of laugh and I found some other place that wasn't the couch or the bed to sleep that night.